Acoustic Neuroma -part 1

It was late September when I went to my family doctor complaining of an ear ache. This was the third time I had been to see him since the beginning of summer for this very same issue. He looked in my ears and told me he saw no signs of infection, gave me yet another script for antibiotics and sent me on my way after spending less than five minutes with me. The drugs did not cure me, or relieve the ear pain. I decided that I need to find a doctor who would listen to me and help fix this pain in my ear. After reviewing a list of doctors that took my insurance, I selected a new family doc for myself.

On my first visit, I bought him a complete copy of my medical history (a good idea when changing doctors) I told him of how I had been to my former doctor 3 times and had not gotten any relief from my ear pain. He looked at my ears, and agreed he did not see any infection that would be causing my ear pain, but wanted me to do one more round of antibiotics to be sure. I took that drugs and came back to see him in two weeks. We talked about pain and the ringing that I realized I was hearing. I was sent to an ENT, who took a full medical history from me and did hearing test, and electrode(it has a real name but I can't remember it) test among others. The hearing test showed I had about 15% hearing loss of high frequency in my left ear (the ear I was having pain in). The electrode test results showed I tested positive for meniere's disease. Since sometime you get a false positive on the electrode test, I was sent for a MRI to rule that out.

It turned out that it was a false positive on the Menier's disease. The MIR revealed a 1.5cm acoustic Neuroma on the left side of my brain, in that little canal that the hearing, balance, and facial nerve leave the skull. Not really the news I was hoping for. The ENT doctor gave me a brief over view of what an acoustic neuroma was and the numbers of two of the top surgeons in Kansas City area to do this kind of work. He also gave me the number of one of the best radiologist in the area. I set up appointments with both the surgeons and the radiologist. I went to the internet and searched for more information. I wanted to have as much information as I could when I went to see the specialist.

For those that have never been referred to a specialist, sometimes it can take weeks or months to get in to see them, especially if you condition is not life threatening. They do not consider acoustic neuroma's life threatening. It was end of December before I could get in to see the 1st specialist. The radiologist was first. He told me how they would take pictures of my brain and design a series treatments to kill the tumor. He told me that there would be a 50/50 chance I would lose facial movement and a 90% chance I would lose my hearing. He also told me that he could not say with 100% certainty that radiation would kill all of the tumor but there is a 99% success rate. Which is pretty good. There would be no leave of absent from work needed. They would do the treatments over the course of a few weeks and I would only take a few hours each week. My husband was sold that this is the way I should go. It sounded good, but I wasn't sold. I still wanted to talk to the surgeons.

The first surgeon I met with was the ENT. He explained that surgery would be a tag team event between himself and the brain surgeon. That they would shave about 1/3 of my head around my ear, make a cut in front of my ear and up the side of my head, pull the skin and muscles back and cut a square in my skull bone and remove it. Then they would lift/move my brain to one side so they can get to the bone that makes the canal than holds the acoustic neuroma and the hearing, balance, and facial nerve. (The tumor actually grows on the balance nerve but the hearing never is usually were you find signs of the damage first.) They would chip a hole in the bone of the canal and go in after the tumor. They would snip the balance nevre on each side of the tumor and remove the whole tumor at once. The would be a small amount of fat from my belly and pack it around where they remove the tumor and close my head back up. I would need to be off work for up to 6 weeks. They told me there would be a 50/50 chance that I would loose all of my hearing and 50/50 I would loose my facial nerve. 99% success rate with surgery as well. I met with the brain surgeon. He said pretty much the same as the ENT surgeon.

My gut feeling about the tumor treatment was to go for the surgery. I just didn't set well me the idea of radiation. In spite of the history that radiation works, it seem to me like magic and leap of faith that something you can't touch or see, could work. With surgery, the tumor would be gone, no if, ands, or but. No faith needed there would be proof that it was dead and gone. The draw back would be 6 weeks off work, shaved head, and recover from surgery. A trade off with it to be rid of the tumor for good. My husband did not like the idea of surgery but in the end agreed it was my body and I should have final say as to what treatment I receive.

Sometimes when faced with the knowledge that you have a tumor, you might get mad or angry and cry out "God, why me?" Strangely enough I didn't go thru this. What i did go thru is putting my world in in order, Am I ready to die and what do I want to do with my things or what do I want to do for my family and friends if this is how I am going to die. (The tumor itself was not life threatening but surgery comes with a risk) You would think that if i was so afraid of death from surgery that I would have gone for the radiation. I knew radiation was not the treatment for me, so I focused on surviving the surgery. That's what I prayed for everyday. "Please God let me survive, let this not be the end of my life." I could have prayed to be tumor free but did not. I accepted that I had a tumor, and that the only way it would go away is treatment (surgery or radiation).

I don't know how or why my faith become so limited. Ask and you shall receive, Claim it and it is yours.